Turmoil

I've been offered a new job. A bit more money, and I'll still be able to telecommute. It's not a huge raise, but between the salary and the health benefits, I'll be pulling in enough now that I won't have to raid my savings account every month like I've been doing for the last two years (!). But I feel pretty guilty about leaving my current employer in the lurch. My current job is with a tiny, tiny company and I'm the only programmer there, so they'll be pretty screwed until they get someone else in.

And...GG came out to see me on Wednesday. It was just odd. We had a bottle of wine and a pizza, and chatted for a few hours, and then started making out. Unfortunately, it was not great. I mean, the making out was OK, but as for what came after...I think we were both just really nervous and it didn't go well. He was worried about me feeling "used" (since he doesn't know what his future plans are) and I told him that I wasn't expecting any kind of a relationship to come out of this (but dammit, I just REALLY needed to get laid, yanno?). Anyway, we did have sex, sort of. There were a lot of attempts, but he was having problems...um..."standing at attention," if you know what I mean. So it was awkward. I think he tried to make up for it by being very enthusiastic in other areas but it just came off as rough. He spent the night, and of course I couldn't sleep. I just have a big problem with sleeping in the same bed with someone I am not very, very comfortable with. So I only got a few hours' sleep, kind of dozing. I was exhausted yesterday, and then I had all these phone interviews with the new company. So...yeah. Not a great experience. I wish I could just curl up in bed and hibernate for a week or two.