Difficult conversation

Last night D & I had our fourth date - a mellow evening on the couch with Borat and some supermarket salad & rotisserie chicken. The movie was hilarious, in a totally cringe-worthy way. And the food was tasty. And the making out was excellent.

Mom, Grandma...y'all might want to stop reading here. HUGE oversharing ahead.

Since it was our fourth date, I kind of expected that the sex issue would come up. And I totally chickened out about initiating The Talk, but gently stopped things from going too far anyhow. Almost immediately after I got home, he called to make sure I got home OK, and I took a deep breath and jumped in. Now, I've never had The Talk before. In the past several years, sex has been a very casual one-off kind of thing, with condoms playing an integral part of the equation. Before that, I was in a couple of short (<6 months) relationships that also featured condoms. And before THAT, well, I was with Babydaddy, and I was on the Pill (until I wasn't...and we know how that turned out, don't we?). But with D...OK, let me just say it. I hate condoms. Hate, hate, hate. Yes, I realize that they are a necessary evil in today's society, and they have certainly kept me safe for many years. But I've waited almost two decades to have sex with D, and I really don't want anything between us (literally) when the moment arrives. So, I kind of blurted out that last week, when I visited the doc, I got tested for the whole lineup of bad juju. Results are not back yet, but I'm not exactly concerned about it; I'm fairly certain I'm in the clear here considering my track record and previous test results. And I set up an appointment to get fitted for a diaphragm, because I've gone that route before, it's non-invasive, and doesn't play havoc with my hormones, so it's a good option. And...he was totally cool. Very reassuring, told me he would get tested himself (yay!) and assured me that he is not seeing anyone else, and would not do so while we are in a relationship. So...once we have our test results & diaphragm in hand (so to speak), we will be free to forge ahead with what I sincerely hope is going to be some totally kickass sex.